Just a freak
by yunor
Summary: Who would have thought that a simple dream could cause so much pain... And so much love...
1. Just a freak

Just a freak…

Chapter 1

The crowd was cheering like never before, the fireworks launched out of the stage as the song began causing a giant uproar from the crowd. The three stars were in their best outfits and sunglasses. Normally Alvin was the big star but not today.

_/watch?v=-ysm5Zp1IXM&noredirect=1_

_[Simon]_  
Went from Mr. 305, Dade County, to Mr. Worldwide, all around the world  
Now we're International, so international, international, so international,

You can't catch me, boy (Alvin: can't catch me, boy)  
I'm overseas and about a hundred G's per show  
Don't test me, boy (Alvin: Don't test me, boy)  
Cause I rap with the best for sure,  
305 till the death of me  
Cremate my body and let the ocean have what's left of me  
But for now, forget about that,  
Blow the whistle  
Baby you're the referee

_[Chorus: Theodore]_  
You put it down like New York City  
I never sleep!  
Wild like Los Angeles  
My fantasy!  
Hotter than Miami  
I feel the heat!  
Ohh, girl, it's International love  
Ohh, it's International love

_[Alvin]_  
I don't play football but I've touched down everywhere  
Everywhere? Everywhere!  
I don't play baseball but I've hit a home run everywhere, everywhere  
I've been to countries and cities I can't pronounce  
And the places on the globe I didn't know existed  
In Romania she pulled me to the side and told me Pit you can have me and my sister  
In Lebanon yeah the women are bomb  
And in Greece you've guessed it the women are sweet  
Spinned all around the world but I ain't gon' lie there's nothing like Miami's heat

_[Chorus: Theodore]_  
You put it down like New York City  
I never sleep!  
Wild like Los Angeles  
My fantasy!  
Hotter than Miami  
I feel the heat!  
Ohh, girl, it's International love  
Ohh, It's International love

_[Simon]_  
Down in D.R. they're looking for visas,  
I ain't talking credit cards if you know what I mean!  
En Cuba, la cosa esta dura!  
But the woman get down, if you know what I mean!  
In Colombia the women got everything done but they are some of the most beautiful women I've ever seen  
In Brazil they're freaky with big oh boobs and their thongs, blue yellow and green!  
In L.A. tengo la Mexicana, en New York tengo la boricua  
Besito para todas las mujeres en Venezuela, muah!  
Y en Miami tengo a cualquiera!

_[Chorus: Theodore]_  
You put it down like New York City  
I never sleep!  
Wild like Los Angeles  
My fantasy!  
Hotter than Miami  
I feel the heat!  
Ohh (Simon + Alvin: all around the world), it's international love (Simon + Alvin: international)  
Ohh, it's international love

_[Theodore]_  
There's not a place that your love don't affect me baby  
So don't ever change  
I crossed the globe when I'm with you, baby  
Haaay  
Woah-oh

_[Alvin]_  
Chris Brown, this is for the women worldwide  
Let's rap

_[Chorus x2: Theodore]_  
You put it down like New York City  
I never sleep!  
Wild like Los Angeles  
My fantasy!  
Hotter than Miami  
I feel the heat!  
Ohh, it's International love  
Ohh, it's International love

As Theo sang the chorus for the final time, Simon wrapped his arms arround Alvin and pulled him gently into a kiss infront oth the entire crowd oh Miami.

_**RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING! *slap* *thud* Muffled groan***_

"Simon get up! You'll be late for school!"

"ugggh… Coming Dave! Hey Alvin you up already?" Simon looked around the room only to find himself being the only one there.

_Why did i have that dream again? That is just wrong… right? _He got up and got dresses as quickly as his stirred mind would let him. After the chipmunk put on his blue sweater and oversized glasses he turned to walk out of the room.

When he arrived at the kitchen Alvin and Theodore were already finished with their breakfast. The only plate still intact was Simons and it was placed right next to _Alvin_. _Oh those brown eyes that sparkled so, his red sweater with that big A, his mischievous smile that always said "I'm up to no good", that soft brown fur, his gentle breath and bubly attitude…_

"Simon are you okay?" Alvin asked with a half concerned half annoyed voice. "You've been staring at me for the past 5 minutes…" When Simon realized that what he had said was true he quickly turned around to hide his very obvious blush from his brother nonetheless.

"I-Im not hungry today… L-Lets just go to school okay I don't wanna be l-late…" He tried to speak as normally as possible but it was getting harder to do so with _those brown eyes_ circling through his mind.

As the three chipmunks said goodbye to Dave and left on the bus Simon choose to sit alone this time. It would be more bearable since all that he could think about was _Alvin. The way he walk, holds himself, stands up for the most pointless of things. _He gave a light chuckle when that thought had crossed his mind. _Oh that fool, he would stand up to every teacher at school even if he said the wrong answer._

At school the hours passed slowly almost like torturing the poor Simon. The one and only Alvin next to him was causing trouble again. And every second of that he had his "I'm up to no good" smile on. When the teacher sorted out Alvin and gave him an hour of doing cleaning at school as punishment, the lesson continued.

"Simon what is the answer to the previous question?"

The chipmunk dressed in blue was string at his own paws deeply lost in a daydream.

"Simon!"

"Huh what?! Amerigo Vespucci!" was the only thing that came to his mind as he was snapped back to reallity.

The whole class burst into lughter at his bewildered expression as he most undoubtedly had no clue of what was goin on in class.

The teacher put a hand over her forehead and gave a deep sigh.

"No Simon the answer is square root of 9. As you obviuosly can't seem to pay any attention in class today you can help out your troublemaker of a brother after class".

"Aww man. Cleaning is already boring now i have to do it with my nerdy brother?" Alvin complained out loud.

"You know what boys make that 2 hours after school." "Alvin you're an idiot" was the silent whisper that came from Simon.

After lunch the chipmunks had 3 free periods but couldnt go home because of Alvin. Again. Alvin and Theodore were fooling around school, but Simon was slowly wandering towards the school stage.

As the big door closed behind him he was standing in a big empty room with a semi-lit stage at the other end.

"Might aswell pass the time with a little practise. We have a tour coming up soon." The small chipmunk made his way to the stage and took a deep breath. Unbeknown to him he wasn't alone in there.

Simon closed his eyes and tried to think of a song to sing. The only one that came to mind was the one he wrote a little while ago and was hoping to get Alvin to sing it with him but that wouldn't happen any time soon now would it.

He gave a small sigh and began singing. (/watch?v=fgO9aQN9vWY&feature=related)

where are we?  
what the hell is going on?  
the dust has only just begun to form  
crop circles in the carpet  
sinking feeling

spin me round again  
and rub my eyes,  
this can't be happening  
when busy streets a mess with people  
would stop to hold their heads heavy

hide and seek  
trains and sewing machines  
all those years  
they were here first

oily marks appear on walls  
where pleasure moments hung before the takeover,  
the sweeping insensitivity of this still life

hide and seek  
trains and sewing machines (oh, you won't catch me around here)  
blood and tears (hearts)  
they were here first

Mmmm whatcha say,  
Mmm that you only meant well?  
well of course you did  
Mmmm whatcha say,  
Mmmm that it's all for the best?  
of course it is  
Mmmm whatcha say?  
Mmmm that it's just what we need  
you decided this  
oooh whatcha say?  
Mmmm what did'cha say?

ransom notes keep falling out your mouth  
mid-sweet talk, newspaper word cut outs (paper word cut outs)  
speak no feeling no I don't believe you (I don't believe you)  
you don't care a bit,  
you don't care a bit

(hide and seek)  
ransom notes keep falling out your mouth  
mid-sweet talk, newspaper word cut outs

(hide and seek)  
speak no feeling no i don't believe you  
you don't care a bit,  
you don't care a (you don't care a) bit

(hide and seek)  
oh no, you don't care a bit  
oh no, you don't care a bit

(hide and seek)  
oh no, you don't care a bit  
you don't care a bit  
you don't care a bit

"I'm just a freak…"


	2. I see nobody by your side

I see nobody by your side

Chapter 2

"I'm just a freak…" The tall-ish chipmunk let out a shallow sigh and sat down at the edge of the stage and put his head inbetween his folded arms.

A paw gently made its way to his right shoulder giving him some comfort. As soon as Simon realized that he was not alone, his head shoot up with a slight look of panic in his eyes. But what Simon saw, he thought he must be dreaming. There he was – Alvin. He stood next to him with a _caring_ smile on his cheeks.

"A-Alvin?" the question held obvious confusion.

"Simon are you okay? I heard you call yourself a freak. Why would you do that?" Alvin asked with genuine concern towards his brother.

Simon looked back down, his eyes starting to water as a few salty droplets fell on hi slap. Alvin simply stood there patiently his paw resting on Simons shoulder, letting him know that he wasnt leaving any time soon. When Simon realized what Alvin was doing, more tears started streaming down his fuzzy cheeks, leaving small moist traces.

Alvin saw that his brother desperately needed someone to comfort him, he saw that the wall that Simon built around him was slowly but surely crumbling away, letting all the repressed emotion out. Simons world was crashing down around him, he had noone he could depend on, he was alone in it all. He knew nobody would accept the truth about him… His breath came to a grinding halt as he felt a warm embrace coming from his back. He looked down only to see arms in red sleeves and paws on the end that were hugging him tightly.

Simon tensed up and wanted to scream right there. He was powerless… not a single sound made it out of his mouth, only a quiet sob and even that slowly quieted down when he heard his brothers comforting voice behind him.

/watch?v=4nO9kCJ-TwA

_[Alvin:]_  
With everything happening today  
You don't know whether you're coming or going  
But you think that you're on your way  
Life lined up on the mirror don't blow it

Alvin turned Simons head gently towards him.

Look at me when I'm talking to you  
You looking at me but I'm looking through you  
I see the blood in your eyes  
I see the love in disguise  
I see the pain hidden in your pride  
I see you're not satisfied  
And I don't see nobody else  
I see myself I'm looking at the

Mirror on the wall, here we are again  
Through my rise and fall  
You've been my only friend  
You told me that they can understand the man I am  
So why are we here talkin' to each other again?

Uh, I see the truth in your lies  
I see nobody by your side  
But I'm with you when you are all alone  
And you correct me when I'm looking wrong  
I see the guilt beneath the shame  
I see your soul through your window pane  
I see the scars that remain  
I see you Wayne, I'm looking at the...

Mirror on the wall, here we are again (Yeah)  
Through my rise and fall (Uh-Huh)  
You've been my only friend (my only friend)  
You told me that they can understand the man I am (they can understand)  
So why are we here (misunderstood) talkin' to each other again?

He took one paw from the embrace and used it to wipe his brothers wet cheek, smiling.

Looking at me now I can see my past  
Damn I look just like my fucking dad  
Light it up, that's smoke in mirrors  
I even look good in the broken mirror  
I see my momma smile that's a blessing  
I see the change, I see the message  
And no message could've been any clearer  
So I'm startin' with the man in the...

_[Simon:]_  
Mirror on the wall,

_[Simon:]_  
MJ taught me that.

_[Simon:]_  
Here we are again  
Through my rise and fall  
You've been my only friend

_[Alvin]_  
Take 'em to Mars man

_[Simon:]_  
You told me that they can understand the man I am  
So why are we talkin' to each other again?

_[Alvin:]_  
Uh...

Alvin reasurred his loving brother with a soft smile.

_[Simon:]_  
Mirror on the wall, here we are again (_[Alvin:]_ yeah)  
Through my rise and fall  
You've been my only friend (_[Alvin:]_ Any questions?)  
You told me that they can (_[Alvin:]_ I come to you) understand the man I am (_[Alvin:]_ You always have the answer)  
So why are we here talkin' to each other again?

_[Simon:]_  
Mirror on the wall.

_[Alvin:]_  
Ay, B.P.  
Looks like I did take 'em to Mars this time.

_[Alvin:]_  
So why are we talking to each other again?

Everything went quiet for a moment. Simon was thinking how to answer his brothers question. But before he could do that, Alvin leant closer and sealed his lips with a soft and warm kiss.


	3. All my fault

All my fault

Chapter 3

_Everything went quiet for a moment. Simon was thinking how to answer his brothers question._

_But before he could do that, Alvin leant closer and sealed his lips with a soft and warm kiss._

* * *

Simon felt like his world was flip-turning upside down and back. Sparks were flying from every part of his body, and his mind was slowly slipping into the background.

The blue clad chipmunk felt a pleasant warmth fill his body, but as soon as it came it was replaced by the feeling of immense power. He felt like he could move mountains at that moment, he felt as if he was slowly lifting from the ground and levitating over the whole world.

This neverbefore experienced emotion was cut short by the unmistakable voice of the school jock/bully.

"Aw sick man. I didn't think you'd actually do it." Simon swiftly pulled back from the kiss and looked into Alvins eyes that revealed pure sorrow and regret.

"Fine Al, you win the bet, you get to come to the party this Friday." The jocks face took on a smirk as he said the next sentence "Dude, you better avoid your faggot of a brother from now on if you want to hang out with the cool kids." He turned around and left the way he came, leaving the two chipmunks alone.

The air suddenly became heavy with tension and tears were once again leaving traces on Simons furry cheeks. "T-this was j-just a bet?..." He looked into Alvins eyes, and impulsively pushed him away, causing his older brother to fall flat on his back.

"Did you even think about me at all before you made that stupid bet? Does the word brother mean anything to you?" Simon was standing infront of Alvin with disbelief, hurt and sadness evident in both his eyes and his voice.

"Simon please, let me explain…"

"Save it! You can explain all about how you kissed your faggot brother to your jock friends at the party! Just leave me alone…" He turned around and walked out of the stage room, leaving behind his red clad brother with tears threatening to leave the older chipmunks eyes.

Simon stormed out of the school, not caring if they had to clean or not. Right now he needed some time alone. Alvin followed suit trying to fix what he had done. When he came out of the school building he saw his younger brother running towards the park. He quickly took after him and called out to Simon "Simon! Please wait!".

"Leave me alone!"

"No Simon! I can explain! It was just… SIMON WATCH OUT!"

_**SCREEEETCH! CRASH!**_

"SIMON!" Alvins' frantic cry pierced the air as his brothers limp body skidded across the pavement, leaving behind a bloody trail.

The blue clad chipmunk lay a few feet away from a car that had just hit him with full force. His forehead was bleeding and Alvin was sure he had some broken bones from the way his body bent after the hit.

It took only a few second for Alvin to be by his side and cradling his limp body in his arms. A crowd of teenagers gathered around them and the faint sound of an ambulance could be heard coming closer.

Alvin was holding Simon tight and telling more to himself than to his uncoscious brother "You'll be okay Simon… you'll be okay… they'll make you okay… they have to…". He held his brother close, not caring that his clothes were being soaked in Simons blood. He lifted one of his paws from Simons chest and realized in horror that his forehead was not the only thing bleeding.

"No no no! Simon! You'll be okay! Please be okay! Please!"

The ambulance arrived after a few minutes and the paramedic rushed over to where Alvin was weeping over his brother. The man scooped up Simon in his hand and placed him onto the clearly oversized stretcher, Alvin quickly jumped up to his brothers side and refused to go anywhere.

The ambulance drove as quickly as they could and they soon arrived at the hospital. The stretcher was rolled quickly through the hospital as the paramedic informed the doctor of what damage he could see on Simons' body. Alvin couldn't understand most of what they were saying but he understood one thing. His brother was dying. And it was his fault.


	4. The Last Final Words

The Last Final Words

Chapter 4

…_**Beep…**_

_Sorry… I'm so sorry… Please forgive me…_

…_**Beep…**_

_Your fault! This is all your fault! YOU! I'm dying because of YOU!_

…_**Beep…**_

_No… Simon please… don't hate me… im sorry for everything…_

…_**Beep…**_

_Hate you! I LOATHE you! I never want to see you again!_

…_**Beep…**_

_Simon… please I'm sorry… Simon? Simon! SIMON!_

…_**Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…**_

Alvin woke up with his heart racing and sweat dripping from the end of his fur. The tear stains on his eyes were evident even in his dark brown colored fur.

_Every day… everyday for the past two weeks I've had this dream…_ his paws were shaking slightly as he placed them next to his brothers hand. _Coma… for two weeks now… and it's all my fault…_

He tried swallowing but his dry throat prevented him from doing so. Alvin looked down into the mezmerizingly white sheets his brother was lying on. _Please... wake up..._

**Drip... Drip... Drip...**

Small wet circles were forming on the stainless sheets. Each tear filled to the brim with sorrow and regret. Every single drop holding the wish of turning back time, wishing that it was him instead of his brother that moment. Every stain left on the sheets fuelling his despair, filling his head with _ifs _and _whats_.

Dave – their adoptive father, was reluctant to leave Alvin alone with Simon for every single day of the past two weeks. The young chipmunk was neglecting his studies, his friends, even his own little brother Theodore. But little did they know what exactly was going on inside the eldest of the three and that soon he may just end up an empty shell of what he once was... _And all because of a stupid dare!_

His paws were tightly clutching the white fabric of the bed, his entire body trembling as more and more tears forced themselves through his barricade and out into the open.

More and more thoughts of self-loathing and despise were running rampant arround his head, making his little furry body shake all the more. He was gently dragged back to the room in which he was, when a warm paw was placed on his left shoulder. That simple yet meaningful touch was what broke his final defenses. Even though it was not the person he loved the most, and hurt so deeply, his younger brother managed to call forth his tears of regret, shame and pain, but most powerful was the feeling of... _love._

"Alvin... it's time to go home..." The youngest brother said gently.

At those words Alvins body stiffened and his breath caught shraply. His paws were grabbing the white sheets with all the strenght he could muster. _I'm not leaving him... never again..._

"N-No..." was the choked out sob that he managed to let out.

Almost as if sensing the turmoil that his older brother was going through, Theodore decided not to push the issue. He gently squeezed his brothers' shoulder and slowly turned to leave. As he was closing the door to the small room he could hear a heartbreaking "thank you..." coming from the crying chipmunk.

Time slowly passed by and the salty tears coming from those hazel eyes slowly dried up. The blood-shot eyes rested on the slowly rising and falling chest of his brother. _In... out... in... out..._ As if on cue, memories from that horrible moment began flooding his mind. The moment of happiness when they kissed, the moment of sorrow and regret when the jock opened his mouth, the moment of fear and despair when he was chasing him down the school halls... and the moment of complete, utter emptiness when time seemingly stopped just for him, the moment when he saw the small body skidding across the pavement, leaving behind a bloody trail...

Alvin opened his eyes to see darkness. He had fallen asleep and it was probably around 3 or 4 in the morning. The halls were more or less empty, except fot the few doctors that were doing night duty. His eyes once again rested on his brother – the tranquillity of the moment, the peace that was surrounding Simon was ripping him appart from the inside out. For the first time in two whole weeks, he mustered up the courage to lift his shaking paw, and gently press it against Simons' warm and fuzzy cheek. His vision blurred again as a few droplets of emotion came from his eyes. He leaned in closer and placed a soft, warm kiss onto his brothers' unmoving lips. The movement was so slow and gentle due to Alvins' fear that he might do even more damage than was already done.

The halls were dimly lit and empty. Every now and then a nurse or a doctor came by to check on their patients. It was nearing morning and as was now rutine Dave and Theodore were walking towards the room in which the two older brothers were currently in. Normally they would knock lightly and go inside, but today was different. When they approached the door, a soft and gentle voice could be heard. But it wasn't talking, it was hurting... Theodore placed a paw on the door knob but stopped as soon as Dave put his hand over his paw, giving him a look that said 'Wait and see'.

watch?v=oSVwx6Kf3O8

_Come up to meet you, tell you I'm sorry_  
_You don't know how lovely you are_  
_I had to find you, tell you I need you_  
_Tell you I set you apart_  
_Tell me your secrets, and ask me your questions_  
_Oh let's go back to the start_  
_Running in circles, coming up tails_  
_Heads on a science apart_

_Nobody said it was easy_  
_It's such a shame for us to part_  
_Nobody said it was easy_  
_No one ever said it would be this hard_  
_Oh, take me back to the start._

The ammount of emotion that was poured into every single note, echoed through the hall, drawing the attention of passer-by patients and doctors.

_I was just guessing at numbers and figures_  
_Pulling the puzzles apart_  
_Questions of science, science and progress_  
_Don't speak as loud as my heart_  
_And tell me you love me, come back and haunt me_  
_Oh and I rush to the start_  
_Running in circles, chasing our tails_  
_Coming back as we are_

_Nobody said it was easy_  
_Oh it's such a shame for us to part_  
_Nobody said it was easy_  
_No one ever said it would be so hard_  
_I'm going back to the start_

A small crowd was gathering infront of the door. And surely every single one of them felt a small ammount of pain that was lingering in the last final words.

_Ooooohhhhhhh_

_Ooooohhhhhhh_

_Ooooohhhhhhh_

_Ooooohhhhhhh_

_Ooooohhhhhhh_


	5. The Equality Of Pain

The Equality Of Pain

Chapter 5

We are all born as equals. May we be big or small, black or white, human or chipmunk, there in that little moment we are all equal. It is the choices in life we make that define who we are. It is how we choose to stay in the minds and hearts of people that determine if we were loved or hated. When someone dear to you passes away, they leave a piece of themself in you that helps you to carry on.

As we all have lost someone precious to us, we have learned to move on, but we were never the same. And neither was our little chipmunk, who lost his most precious person in the world to a fate worse and more cruel than death…

The third week of coma was now almost over, and not once has Alvin left his brothers side. The little flame of hope in his big hazel eyes, getting smaller and smaller each day. The once sparkling eyes now held nothing. They were dim and showed no emotion at all. Alvin couldnt bring himself to look at his brother anymore, so his gaze was aimed at the pearl white sheets of the hostpital bed. His paws were unmoving on the edge of the bed, weary as to not disturb the still of the covers.

On the bedside table was a plate of stale soup, that might have once been warm. He didn't care… it was his fault that his little brother was in this state, and he wanted to suffer for what he had done. If he died for it he did not care.

The chipmunk had barely spoken since the second week. He did not sing anymore and hi sonce bubbly demeanor was all but gone.

On the other side of the bed, Theodore and Dave were sitting, sadly looking now over Alvin aswell as Simon. They looked at eachother, bot wanting to say what the other was thinking… "He's changed…."

The painfull silence was suddenly broken by Simons pulse meter shooting up rapidly. Alvins eyes brightened immediately as he stood up over Simon and watched for any sign of him waking up. And surely Simons furry chest started rising and falling faster and faster. Suddenly his eyes shot open in a state of panic as he looked around the white room and into the 3 worried faces.

"SIMON!" The taller chipmunk suddenly found himself in a tight embrace.

"Simon are you okay?" The red clad chipmunk asked in a tone of relief and worry mixed together.

"Geto ut of my sight…" a silent whisper came from the tall chipmunk.

Alvin looked at his brother with a shocked expression on his face. He was about to say something but was cut of by the cold and emotionless voice of his brother "Now…".

Alvin was growing desperate "I'm not leaving my brother ever again!" he yelled at Simon.

"You're not my brother…" Simons voice was full of spite and hate, and it was aimed directly at him.

It was like his heart was being torn straight out of his little furry chest. His eyes lost what little glow they had left and became completely dim. His ears fell flat and his entire body slouched.

"Simon please…" He said silently, tears of regrett falling from his eyes and onto the crumpled covers underneath which lay his… _brother._


End file.
